Prescott: Is Reality Hostile or Nurturing Toward Us?

If I'm to take my past life stuff seriously then I attempted one incarnation where I tried to set everything up perfectly to the way I wanted. I tried to use all the knowledge and ability I'd gained with magic, reality, incarnation, etc and go full on choice and give myself the easiest and most relaxing life ever just as an experiment. I did my best to design it right from beginning to end and thought I'd done a really good job. I even did my best to suppress my memories and inject certain intuitions to make sure I didn't deviate from the script. But me being me, I made sure to put in some failsafes just in case.

It Ironically turned out to be among the worst incarnations I ever had after my uncle murdered my dad and grandpa, killed my siblings, and then conscripted me into a slave portion of the military because I wasn't important enough to kill but couldn't be left alone either. Then made a point to constantly humiliate me for fun for pretty much my entire life. None of which I had chosen, not even fucking close. I only ultimately got out of it because of my failsafes that would trip if I was still there after something like 500 years. If I was there that long, clearly something had gone horrifically wrong. I concluded that 100% control is impossible "in the wild."

If I'm to take my past life stuff seriously then I attempted one incarnation where I tried to set everything up perfectly to the way I wanted. I tried to use all the knowledge and ability I'd gained with magic, reality, incarnation, etc and go full on choice and give myself the easiest and most relaxing life ever just as an experiment. I did my best to design it right from beginning to end and thought I'd done a really good job. I even did my best to suppress my memories and inject certain intuitions to make sure I didn't deviate from the script. But me being me, I made sure to put in some failsafes just in case.

It Ironically turned out to be among the worst incarnations I ever had after my uncle murdered my dad and grandpa, killed my siblings, and then conscripted me into a slave portion of the military because I wasn't important enough to kill but couldn't be left alone either. Then made a point to constantly humiliate me for fun for pretty much my entire life. None of which I had chosen, not even fucking close. I only ultimately got out of it because of my failsafes that would trip if I was still there after something like 500 years. If I was there that long, clearly something had gone horrifically wrong. I concluded that 100% control is impossible "in the wild."

Perhaps I'm just not understanding this post, but are you saying that your conscious awareness spent 500 years in another life, and this happened while you were experiencing this life you're in now? What does it mean to "attempt an incarnation"? This is different from being reincarnated after death? Pardon my ignorance on these matters, just very confused by this post.

Perhaps I'm just not understanding this post, but are you saying that your conscious awareness spent 500 years in another life, and this happened while you were experiencing this life you're in now? What does it mean to "attempt an incarnation"? This is different from being reincarnated after death? Pardon my ignorance on these matters, just very confused by this post.

No this wasn't during this life this was a past life thing. Short version is that what I consider "normal life" is probably what would be classed as a "Between life experience" from what I've read. Basically, over a very long period of time, so the memories go, I and a bunch of other people learned how to... not... die..,? I don't know how to explain it. I don't want to use the word "ascend" because I don't think that's accurate. Regardless, the result was that there was no longer a difference or separation between our souls and our bodies which itself had some interesting effects. It was probably functionally a form of ascension if not literally depending how it's defined. After awhile we learned that it was possible to leave that body and enter the incarnation process. So we started doing these things we called "one shots" where we'd find a world somewhere that looked interesting and inject ourselves into it. After doing enough of them under various circumstances and developing a few "best practices" I thought I'd try constructing one from start to finish because it seemed like it should be possible. Everything I'd learned up to that point said reality was totally and completely infinite with no global restrictions. Literally if you can imagine it, chances are it already exists somewhere or will exist because you went looking for it, hard to tell which is which. Either way it meant you should be able to find a universe with a place with a race with etc that has a timeline that goes exactly the way you want it to go, start to finish. It turned out you couldn't. Or at least I couldn't. There were way too many uncontrolled variables at play.

Yeah, 500 years in one body, because I didn't want to age, because ageing sucks. I picked a race that didn't age the same way humans do. How their biology worked I don't know, I never looked into it, I didn't really care. But I didn't intend on staying there for anywhere near that long. I don't know if it was actually 500 years as measured in years here, but it probably wasn't that far off. Also at this point 500 is an estimate, I'm pretty sure it wasn't exactly that amount but I don't remember everything.

I guess to answer the question of the OP, Reality isn't nurturing or hostile, it's just kinda there. Some parts happen to support life, some parts don't but it all depends on a whole slew of other variables. But at least as far as my memories go, doesn't look like there's a grand purpose to any of this at the most fundamental levels. It just kinda happened somehow. I at least never found even a hint of a true overarching purpose or direction, everything was too all over the place for me to conclude that.

Standard disclosure: There's no way for me to get any concrete verification any of this even happened even though I tend to believe it so I'm not stating this as any sort of absolute fact. I could always be wrong. I've also left out a ridiculous amount of information to keep this manageable.

No this wasn't during this life this was a past life thing. Short version is that what I consider "normal life" is probably what would be classed as a "Between life experience" from what I've read. Basically, over a very long period of time, so the memories go, I and a bunch of other people learned how to... not... die..,? I don't know how to explain it. I don't want to use the word "ascend" because I don't think that's accurate. Regardless, the result was that there was no longer a difference or separation between our souls and our bodies which itself had some interesting effects. It was probably functionally a form of ascension if not literally depending how it's defined. After awhile we learned that it was possible to leave that body and enter the incarnation process. So we started doing these things we called "one shots" where we'd find a world somewhere that looked interesting and inject ourselves into it. After doing enough of them under various circumstances and developing a few "best practices" I thought I'd try constructing one from start to finish because it seemed like it should be possible. Everything I'd learned up to that point said reality was totally and completely infinite with no global restrictions. Literally if you can imagine it, chances are it already exists somewhere or will exist because you went looking for it, hard to tell which is which. Either way it meant you should be able to find a universe with a place with a race with etc that has a timeline that goes exactly the way you want it to go, start to finish. It turned out you couldn't. Or at least I couldn't. There were way too many uncontrolled variables at play.

Yeah, 500 years in one body, because I didn't want to age, because ageing sucks. I picked a race that didn't age the same way humans do. How their biology worked I don't know, I never looked into it, I didn't really care. But I didn't intend on staying there for anywhere near that long. I don't know if it was actually 500 years as measured in years here, but it probably wasn't that far off. Also at this point 500 is an estimate, I'm pretty sure it wasn't exactly that amount but I don't remember everything.

I guess to answer the question of the OP, Reality isn't nurturing or hostile, it's just kinda there. Some parts happen to support life, some parts don't but it all depends on a whole slew of other variables. But at least as far as my memories go, doesn't look like there's a grand purpose to any of this at the most fundamental levels. It just kinda happened somehow. I at least never found even a hint of a true overarching purpose or direction, everything was too all over the place for me to conclude that.

Standard disclosure: There's no way for me to get any concrete verification any of this even happened even though I tend to believe it so I'm not stating this as any sort of absolute fact. I could always be wrong. I've also left out a ridiculous amount of information to keep this manageable.

I find your standard disclosure quite courageous. I feel like you've mentioned before that you could be imagining some of the things that happen to you... have you ever experienced things like you shared in the post above that you thought were real but later you realized that they were not real? Do you think it's possible that all of it is being imagined? I'm just trying to wrap my head around someone having such a textured,  detailed experience and expressing that it's possible that it could have not even happened. What would it be if it didn't happen? A hallucination? I'm assuming it doesn't feel like it could just be a  overactive imagination. Thanks again for the detailed response!

I find your standard disclosure quite courageous. I feel like you've mentioned before that you could be imagining some of the things that happen to you... have you ever experienced things like you shared in the post above that you thought were real but later you realized that they were not real? Do you think it's possible that all of it is being imagined? I'm just trying to wrap my head around someone having such a textured,  detailed experience and expressing that it's possible that it could have not even happened. What would it be if it didn't happen? A hallucination? I'm assuming it doesn't feel like it could just be a  overactive imagination. Thanks again for the detailed response!

I try to always mention that I could be wrong but sometimes it gets annoying to always put that in. That’s why it’s become my standard disclosure. I recognise how crazy the things I say sound to others and also that I have no way of backing them up. I’m glad you see it as courageous but to me it’s just common sense.

I can’t think of a past life thing that I first believed but later found out was false. Largely because it’s hard to verify either way. It’s also really hard for me to believe it in the first place so I’m cautious up front. It’s easy to believe an experience but hard to believe the story behind the experience. However for my training I have found one thing that I can think of where I believed something was real and then found out it was false. An opportunistic poltergeist I did that I found video evidence for that matched what I remembered doing perfectly. But then turned out to be all SFX. That experience is ambiguous though because of how closely they match and previous experimental observations I’ve made about time. It’s possible that I desynced with the timeline that I found the video in, causing one timeline to have a genuine experience that got recorded but this one to have the same thing be a SFX movie. Making the geist technically real, but I have no way to confirm or refute that. All I know is the video I found is not real. But it creeps me out just how perfectly accurate it is to what I remembered doing.

I don’t think it’s possible for all the past life stuff to be imagination because I’ve gotten lots of pieces of evidence from lots of different areas that support it. The many, many confirmed shared dreams between Dreamsoap, me, and our supposed past life friends. The fact that the physics of magic gets repeatedly confirmed to work the way I remember even though it’s nowhere near the level I want yet. The repeated times said friends have directly influenced the world around us, appearing as full apparitions once to me as well. Dreamsoap pulling me completely out of my body multiple times where I was able to talk to said friends directly. Dreamsoap and my’s shared pastlife stories that we “imagined” totally interdependently, even getting critical names the same despite the different perspectives. Shared dreams we’ve confirmed from before we even knew each other existed here. The sheer amount and severity of our paranormal experiences that go far above and beyond what other people tend to get. The weird way some spirits have acted around us during some of these experiences, things they’d do and say that only make sense if the past life story is true. In some cases the spirits themselves act like it’s all true and think I’m weird for not just believing it at this point. Independent confirmations from other people who describe things accurately. And more that I can’t think of right now.

The idea that all of that could be false is, in my opinion, so unlikely it might as well be impossible. But, that doesn’t mean it’s all true either. There are likely some individual experiences or memories that aren’t real and that’s why I don’t believe it outright even if I emotionally want to. For example it’s outright impossible to verify the reality of a projection until after that fact and only if it’s shared with someone down here such as Dreamsoap. And since we’ve had unconfirmed ones before, how do I know that ones that only feature my friends or other spirits are real? I can’t, so I don’t.

Also, Ironically, if the story is real it therefore could also be false. The story indicates that we developed and encountered some incredibly high levels of magic and technology over time. Stuff that could easily create a full on matrix illusion that I could be living in right now. For example I designed a technique a long time ago to force someone to see the perspective of other people by making them relive that persons entire life in complete sensory detail. It was originally designed to be an anti-bigot weapon. I’m not going to go into the mechanics of how it works because I think that information should be kept secret but sufficed to say I know that its entirely possible for someone to put someone else into a complete sensory illusion because I know how to do that. How? Because in Dreamsoap and my’s very first confirmed shared dream I used that technique on her. She nicknamed it “Karma’s fMirror” and the name stuck ever since. So it’s totally possible that I’m sitting in a seal of some type and all of this is fake. I don’t think I am because if I was there’s a lot of tiny discrepancies that I’d expect to see that I don’t but nonetheless it’s technically possible.

Fun fact, when I first jined Skeptiko and started hearing about the concept of the “Life Review” some people experience as part of NDE’s I got very intrigued because it sounds incredibly similar to the mechanics of Karma’s Mirror. As if someone had the same idea or posssibly, if all the past life stuff is true, modified my technique for their own purposes.

I tend to get anxious for a few reasons. Mainly the sheer craziness of the past life story. Stating that magic and technology far beyond anything I’ve ever seen in fiction is real and that I’ve lived as a soldier for most of my existence fighting everything from aliens to zombies to legitimate extra planar threats to whatever you can think of. And that by the most recent times our group was almost exclusively dealing with world+ ending threats in multiple universes and had largely achieved the ability to create our own universes if we wanted to. Sometimes having to deal with other people who could do the same. Nothing about the story itself is inherently unbelievable. As in, it doesn’t state I’m some sort of special snowflake chosen one. If anything it states the opposite. I started with no magic, failed repeatedly, only made tiny gains at the very beginning, and slowly got better over time. There were a lot of times where the “good guys” didn’t win, victories that were rendered pointless later and general unfairness, pain and sufferring. But there was also the opposite too. Then there’s a bunch of random stuff mixed in. Some of my and Dreamsoap’s most vivd memories are incredibly mundane, like ordering a carpet or getting up in the middle of the night to get water. All that fighting didn’t happen on it’s own, we only experienced it so much because we went out looking for it and If we weren’t looking we did other normal mundane stuff. Trouble was really hard to find but sometimes it found us first.

So… If that’s all true… why don’t I have any magic? Why despite trying for all this time do I not yet have any of that ability? Why is the best I can do some opportunistic poltergeists, shared dreams, OBE’s and the like? Furthermore, if it’s true, why don’t my friends just come down here and pull us out? Surely these people must be capable of that? They certainly seem to want us to come home badly enough, so what’s the holdup?

Dreamsoap is always quick to remind me that there’s lots of reasons for all that. She tends to belive in me a lot more than I do most of the time. For example this life is probably the worst possible conditions for developing magic I’ve ever had. Physically, mentally and emotionally. For one, if you don’t get magic as a kid, you’re probably no getting it. This is because the body by default can’t acutally use magic. If you don’t train it and take advantage of the adolescent growth spurt your chances of being good at it as an adult are pretty slim. It’s not that it can’t be done it’s just that the metabolism slows down so much once you’re an adult that it takes fucking forever to get anything done. And the very first thing that needs to be done is rewiring your brain to think properly for magic and the other changes. It's really easy to do in a world full of magic where it's a known fact of existence, but here where I don't see other people do it on a daily basis it's very hard to make that mental shift.

 I only started this when I was 23, got a bunch of success, and then got bombarded with past life confirmation stuff which gave me a bunch of emotional issues, then I fried myself which set me back a lot. Now I’m 30, still not over the emotional stuff, which means I can’t do the mental stuff, which means I can’t do the physical stuff, which is already going to be much slower becasuse I’m fucking 30. I’m working on it but it’s slow and frustrating and I sometimes winder if I’ll ever be able to do it or if any of it was ever real.

It’s not even like this hasn’t happened before especially with emotional trauma. Hell, the most recent memories are a series of me making a mistake then losing 90% of my ability out of fear of making another mistake and then getting over it at the end usually because of a life or death situation. And its not just me, I’ve been in incarnations with people who went from top tier fighters to zero magic because they’d watched family die in front of them and then years later would snap and gain it all back in one shot.

As for why my friends won’t come down they’ve given me various reasons that add up to a combination of them being capable but being hampered because of some barrier thing that may or may not be naturally occurring and other people, aliens and not, threatening that if they try to come through or do anything too big, really bad shit will happen to the world at large. I was really skeptical of this for a long time given how powerful these people supposedly are. I didn’t believe that they’d really have that much trouble gettting through this supposed distortion field and I wondered about how severe the whole alien/celestial thing was. I got very jaded about being told things were going to happen over and over and then nothing happening. Although again that’s ambiguous because of the difficulty in confirming projections. Then Dreamsoap and I found a youtube channel called Secureteam10 that deals in ufo’s and the like and had our minds blown at some of the content. it’s a channel I highly recommend, it’s not perfect but it’s certainly the least crazy and most evidence based I’ve seen. We’ve gotten a number of confirmations and corroborations from there on a number of things. Now I think my friends are probably telling the truth because just with what I’ve seen on that channel even I would be sitting up there going “Yeah… Let’s just wait it out for now... just in case.” I imagine they’re aware of a lot more than me.

One of the biggest things that causes me anxiety is that I don’t want to end up like some of the spiritualists I’ve met in the past. People who believe crazy things with no basis, spout it around like they know what they’re talking about. Insult people who disagree. And I’m constantly afraid that that’s what I am already if not turning into because of the craziness of what I think I’ve experienced. So I get torn between the evidence I do have for it and the lack of large scale success with my magic which makes me doubt the other evidence.

Answering questions like yours helps because it forces me to go through everything and see what evidence I have for what and what is most likely to be true. That being said I still can't prove any of it to you and I won't ever expect you to believe any of it.

One of the biggest things that causes me anxiety is that I don’t want to end up like some of the spiritualists I’ve met in the past. People who believe crazy things with no basis, spout it around like they know what they’re talking about. Insult people who disagree. And I’m constantly afraid that that’s what I am already if not turning into because of the craziness of what I think I’ve experienced.

I know what you mean but that isn't you.  You seem to question yourself a lot more than those spiritualists and the various New Age "gurus" I have met.  I remember arguing with one once that the only reason I was wearing the shirt I was wearing was that it was at the top of the pile and not because I subconsciously chose the colour to protect myself from something.  It's impossible arguing with that type, but as I said, that isn't you.  You are better than that!

Logic is not the only way of apprehending the truth or making a decision. When you look for your socks and know they are under your bed, you are not using logic, you are using your eyesight. When you decide to hug a loved one, do you do a cost benefit analysis? I think you hug them because you feel an emotion that motivates you. Is it a wrong decision because it is based on an emotion?

I like this.

Logic is not the only way of apprehending the truth or making a decision. When you look for your socks and know they are under your bed, you are not using logic, you are using your eyesight. When you decide to hug a loved one, do you do a cost benefit analysis? I think you hug them because you feel an emotion that motivates you. Is it a wrong decision because it is based on an emotion?

Interestingly resonates with something I read today from the Chinese/Buddhist Legend Journey to the West:

“You can walk from the time of your youth till the time you grow old, and after that till you become youthful again and even after going through such a cycle a thousand times, you may still find it difficult to reach the place you want to go. But when your perceive, by the resoluteness of your will, the Buddha nature in all things, and when every one of your thoughts goes back to Its very source in your memory, that will be the time you arrive at Spirit Mountain.”

-Journey to the West