Ayahuasca ~ a rather unexpected journey into (yet another) parallel life

The possibilities never seem to end... the inexplicability also never seems to end. Not entirely sure what to make of this set of experiences, but I may as well... dump into words, so I can think about it, along with sharing it, for whatever it's worth.

During my Ayahuasca journey last night / this morning, I went through the psychological healing I had requested ~ clearing the forefront of my mind of stress, anxiety and depression, letting it go. That was all well and good. Not easy, but not... as difficult as it would have been had I not do some mental preparation with the help of my spirit guides over the past week or so.

I had drunk the equivalent of 3 grams of Syrian Rue and 12 grams of Chaliponga. 50mls each, mixed with 100mls of pear juice. Didn't taste too bad. Pear juice seems to make the otherwise chalky and unpleasant Chaliponga rather tolerable.

Memory is fuzzy as to the order of events and when they began, so starting where I can, I beforehand encountered an entity I had encountered in a previous journey ~ he spoke in an extremely esoteric tongue, and he literally used my voice to vocalize it. It was a very complicated language, full of a ton of incomprehensible nuances. I only got vague ideas out of what was attempting to be communicated. Maybe it was beyond my ability to comprehend. I got the feeling that it was... a version of me from some... higher existence, whatever that means. Not the same as my soul, seemingly? Well, it is what it is.

Next came the really interesting part... I found myself delving into a parallel life, where I was... some kind of eagle creature. There was a monarchy system. The perspectives were confusing and hard to figure out timeline-wise, but I first experienced being an eagle who was jealous and eager for power, so he... raped the princess, and was subsequently exiled, tortured and executed for his horrendous crime. The princess trusted him, and he betrayed that trust.

Next was the memory of being this angry tyrant of an eagle, bitter, cruel and full of coldness and anger, rage and lust for power and control. Maybe a reincarnation...?

At some point, I have the memory of yet the perspective of being another eagle who is severely wounded, barely clinging to awareness, with his brother desperately calling out to him. Maybe there was a battle? Doesn't have the same quality as the previous eagle. Yet another reincarnation, it seems.

Next, another flash of another eagle, who seems to be the then-queen's brother? I am unsure.

Next came another perspective of being an eagle (another reincarnation...?) who was in competition with his brother, both sons of the queen, to win over the princess, to become the next king. The princess ended up choosing eagle-me, with the queen looking rather smug, apparently knowing that was what was going to happen. Then... some magical force scoops up the eagle-me and the princess, transmuting them into... drakes, dragons? On post reflection, this was baffling, confusing, and made me question the reality of the experience, but in the end, I could only accept that the whole thing is inexplicable anyways ~ who am I to question the experience? It is... what it is. Maybe it is possible in... that reality, this reality, considering I was fully immersed in the perspective.

Then... a confusing flurry of events, where the queen is... betrayed and murdered by the loser brother, but then the queen is somehow later revived, shimmering back into existence. Not before the new king, through my voice, delivers an extremely impassioned beatdown of the loser brother, condemning him in so many vicious words, never running out of new, creative and bitter condemnations to utter. It was pretty impressive, if not for how loud my voice was... afterwards, I was worried I'd awoken my downstairs neighbour, haha... uh, hopefully not?

The loser brother is slowly dismembered, wings snapped, before finally being finished off for good. Sweet vengeance. Before that fully takes place, the loser brother tries to convince him that their mother, the queen, is a monster, that she's lived far too long, that he deserved to be king, that none of it was fair. Why did now-dragon-parallel-me get chosen? Lots of long-term resentment and bitterness, I suppose, on reflection.

In the end, the queen is revived, but is then forced to abdicate to parallel-me, the new king, as the princess, now queen, awkwardly points out that she died and rulership passes on. The former queen brushes it off, replying that death happens. There is some confusion as to how the former queen came back, but is gradually accepted, after the shock wears off.

Afterwards, the former queen lectures, teases and taunts parallel-me, needling him, giving all sorts of uncomfortable advice that is nevertheless not abnormal, apparently. Parallel-me sighs and is frustrated with the high responsibility of being king, never quite thinking through the consequences that led to the position, so he tries to be kingly and give orders.

Then they talk about a war that happened, and that is still happening. Parallel-me requests that a message be sent off to see if everyone is okay. I learn that they don't like to talk about it much, as it is painful to think about. The former queen talks sadly about how previous king died fighting in the war, and that she misses him. For some reason, he wasn't revived unlike the former queen, which left me confused. After thinking about it, I got the feeling it had to do with time and proximity to the body, though it is never explained how revival was possible. Nobody seemed to question it, maybe just glad that the former queen was alive again.

There is talk between parallel-me and his queen about an ancient war where the eagles were almost driven to extinction long ago, but the parallel-me doubts that it happened. Sure, there were ruins, but that doesn't mean it was because of some distant supposed war. In the supposed war, the eagles were betrayed by their friends, for some reason, but lived on. How some become drakes, dragons, I have no idea, but it just seems to be considered relatively normal in their culture.

Other events happen, but I don't recall much. It was already a lot to take it, so I guess my mind has its limits. At some point, my perspective abruptly ends, and I in my normal frame of consciousness again. I barely know what to make of the experience... just that it... seemed to happen, me perceiving it, timeline... then real-ish time? Mostly, it seems.

Well... make of this highly fantastical-sounding diatribe whatever you will. I've sort of given up questioning inexplicabilities like this... maybe this sort of thing is possible in some other reality, whatever its nature. It certainly doesn't seem to symbolize anything...

Thanks for sharing this with us. It's hard to know how to respond to this mass of psychedelically-obtained material. It is quite impressive even if it has the least (or not paranormal) type of explanation - the outpourings of a well-developed subconscious confabulation mechanism fuelled by imaginitive embellishment of material obtained by lifelong reading of various stories in the literature, plus movies and TV entertainment material.

Of course I think it is much more than that, but what that is is mysterious. I don't think the real (non-psychological but instead paranormal) source is a literal interpretation - parallel lives as essentially alien beings in some other realm than physical Earth reality, beings still somehow closely related to Earthly animals like eagles, living out lives somehow related to the grand and romantic vision quest mythos. I think there is probably some sort of reality in these stories, but the exact nature of that seems to be too mysterious and hidden to figure out from our Earthly perspective.

In either case, there probably are meaningful connections to the life of the experiencer.
 
Two facts seem to stand out - first, that there is a paranormal flavor to this material, but it contains no verifiable veridical evidence toward it's non-psychological reality. and second, that based on this example anyway Ayahuasca doesn't seem to be a reliable and useful way of peering into other non-Earthly realms.

Thanks for sharing this with us. It's hard to know how to respond to this mass of psychedelically-obtained material. It is quite impressive even if it has the least (or not paranormal) type of explanation - the outpourings of a well-developed subconscious confabulation mechanism fuelled by imaginitive embellishment of material obtained by lifelong reading of various stories in the literature, plus movies and TV entertainment material.

I don't think I could confabulate something with so complex a narrative structure. One of my thoughts, as I was trying to comprehend it, was to amusingly think of the old Disney film The Lion King. Or Shakespeare. However... family and political stuff isn't uncommon, so trying to find subconscious explanations for something like this will probably never make much sense.

Of course I think it is much more than that, but what that is is mysterious. I don't think the real (non-psychological but instead paranormal) source is a literal interpretation - parallel lives as essentially alien beings in some other realm than physical Earth reality, beings still somehow closely related to Earthly animals like eagles, living out lives somehow related to the grand and romantic vision quest mythos. I think there is probably some sort of reality in these stories, but the exact nature of that seems to be too mysterious and hidden to figure out from our Earthly perspective.

It's a bit strange, because I struggle to classify it. Yes, I accessed it while deep in a psychedelic headspace, yet various aspects felt very mundane, as it were ~ the seeming perception of memories and experiences that were sensationally physical and grounded in that reality. (Nevermind what looked to be a limited form of actual magic... that is more baffling than anything else about it, actually.)

The memories, the emotions, the perceptions I could make out ~ it was rather mundane and apparently physical, albeit when I was entirely immersed in the experience. Chaliponga, as a DMT source, is well-known known for its far more psychological headspace, laced with mainly greens and blues, which is what I got. There often weren't clear visuals, but the psychological comprehension and connection was certainly strong enough.

So... who is to say that there aren't different versions of physical reality? Of course, they don't really overlap all that easily ~ it took me so many psychedelic journeys to even begin accessing this sort of thing, and there was no belief in such a thing beforehand. I just... sort of stumbled into it. Maybe the spirits decided it's important... for some reason I'm trying to comprehend still.

In either case, there probably are meaningful connections to the life of the experiencer.

What stood out to me, as I closely analyzed the experience, was how close the feeling of their... energy, for lack of a better word, was to my own. It was me... but not me. It's the sort of thing that is confusing, because it feels like you... but it is obviously in quite a different physical reality and form, with a very different personality and set of memories and experiences. A sort of high strangeness.

Two facts seem to stand out - first, that there is a paranormal flavor to this material, but it contains no verifiable veridical evidence toward it's non-psychological reality

Of course it's not verifiably veridical ~ I highly doubt I'd find anyone else who's had a similar experience. It also has the very obvious psychological component ~ whatever that... connection's nature is. But that doesn't make it any less inexplicably real-feeling... the emotional impacts of that one part of the journey stood out quite clearly... I'm good about keeping my silence during a journey, but that emotion-fueled rant was strong enough to leak into me speaking it in this one... somehow. I was entirely lost in it for its duration, one with the outrage.

and second, that based on this example anyway Ayahuasca doesn't seem to be a reliable and useful way of peering into other non-Earthly realms.

This is... a rather strange thing to state. Ayahuasca, like all psychedelics, affects different individuals differently, so it is not at all obvious how it may affect different individuals or why.

I never asked to be shown parallel lives, but at some point ~ after years of journeying, they just inexplicably start occurring, without explanation.

They are... not this physical reality, but are physical in their own right, quite plainly. Which is actually more baffling than if it were more abstract, because it means I will end up comparing it to this physical reality I inhabit ~ and have ended up finding no overlaps, except in that both existences have physical qualities.

I don't feel like I can point to quantum weirdness quite, either... this feels like something that transcends that. Sure... maybe DMT hyperspace is just some deep form of quantum exploration, as I had the recent weird thought about, but this... feels like I've gone beyond that into stranger territory I cannot put into any existing box.

Nobody expects to experience something so... curious. Different cultures, different realities, similar rules ~ except where telepathy (not particularly weird, at this point) and a couple unexplained examples of fucking magic (seriously, what else do I call it?) are involved.

For me maybe the most valuable part is the mention of psychological healing at the start. I've not explored use of substances to facilitate that. But it did take a deep inner journey to release some of my own pains. Perhaps unlocking things and discovering other parts of existence is somehow necessarily connected, in that pains we carry might have actual experience behind them, even if not in this life.

For me maybe the most valuable part is the mention of psychological healing at the start. I've not explored use of substances to facilitate that. But it did take a deep inner journey to release some of my own pains.

Indeed... it is what I requested, so I got that and then some, I suppose.

Would you mind sharing some of your own journeys, perhaps in another thread? When you are ready, of course.

Perhaps unlocking things and discovering other parts of existence is somehow necessarily connected, in that pains we carry might have actual experience behind them, even if not in this life.

Indeed, that is interesting to consider. Perhaps the initial release made it possible. Maybe the memories from that parallel life were somehow affecting me in this one... though deeply unconscious, at that. I'm still not sure how it works, however. But, maybe there's no use obsessing over it, when I have so little information to work with, and even if I did have more, it still wouldn't be particularly relevant to this reality I exist in.

Still, wounds can run deep, perhaps, so healing can still be helpful overall, even if the wounds aren't obvious.

It is interesting how it happened in a seeming sequence of lifetimes, though maybe not one directly after the other. It didn't happen with the others, though perhaps that's because in those other parallel realities, there aren't troubling circumstances like this parallel one seems to have ~ a theme of war, death, suffering, betrayal.

I have no such parallels that I can think in my life, nor anything that calls from past lives of this reality to parallel them.

Reality can be certainly stranger than fiction, I suppose, aha... psychedelics can do that for you, I suppose ~ the truly unexpected, that is.

 Two facts seem to stand out - first, that there is a paranormal flavor to this material, but it contains no verifiable veridical evidence toward it's non-psychological reality. and second, that based on this example anyway Ayahuasca doesn't seem to be a reliable and useful way of peering into other non-Earthly realms.

There are OOBEs with veridical anecdotes in psychedelic use, similar to the veridical confirmations we get from NDEs.

As for a reliable way of peering into non-Earthly realms, not sure such a thing exists. There are some commonalities we can try to map, but also stark differences and even contradictions.

I feel one can even make the case that Ayahuasca/DMT exploration conforms less to the experiencer's pre-existing beliefs. The one case I can think of where someone meets a spiritual being they'd never heard of - the goddess Tara - was a psychedelic trip.

edit: Admittedly difficult to judge exactly, because by now plenty of people have expectations for what they will see during an Ayahuasca/DMT trip. But I don't know if any of the subjects Strassman gave DMT to in the 90s were expecting the bizarre clowns and other weird stuff.

There are OOBEs with veridical anecdotes in psychedelic use, similar to the veridical confirmations we get from NDEs.

As for a reliable way of peering into non-Earthly realms, not sure such a thing exists. There are some commonalities we can try to map, but also stark differences and even contradictions.

I feel one can even make the case that Ayahuasca/DMT exploration conforms less to the experiencer's pre-existing beliefs. The one case I can think of where someone meets a spiritual being they'd never heard of - the goddess Tara - was a psychedelic trip.

edit: Admittedly difficult to judge exactly, because by now plenty of people have expectations for what they will see during an Ayahuasca/DMT trip. But I don't know if any of the subjects Strassman gave DMT to in the 90s were expecting the bizarre clowns and other weird stuff.

Concerning veridicality, I just meant that the experience described by Valmar certainly didn't have an OOBE associated with it that could be investigated for verification, and that if that experience was similar in most ways to other such psychedelic "trips", psychedelic "trips" in general could be pronounced mostly unverifiable. So therefore they would not have the claim from any sort of semi-scientific standpoint (that NDEs have) to being visions or glimpses into a greater afterdeath or parallel reality.

The skeptical hypothesis (that I can't fully ascribe to) would be that much or most of the psychedelically-obtained experience material could have roots in some sort of subconscious confabulation fuelled by psychologically deep unconsciously buried needs. The full capabilities of the subconscious or unconscious mind are not well mapped out, and it seems to me might be quite amazing in terms of fabricating and dramatizing various "stories' with deep psychological importance to the individual.

It's well-known how easily subconscious confabulation fuelled by conscious/unconscious desires and therapist suggestions enter into the supposed "past lives" elicited under hypnotic regression therapy. This can be quite a prolific source of "stories". I still think that there might be a connection between this last-mentioned phenomenon and psychedelic experiences.

Concerning veridicality, I just meant that the experience described by Valmar certainly didn't have an OOBE associated with it that could be investigated for verification, and that if that experience was similar in most ways to other such psychedelic "trips", psychedelic "trips" in general could be pronounced mostly unverifiable. So therefore they would not have the claim from any sort of semi-scientific standpoint (that NDEs have) to being visions or glimpses into a greater afterdeath or parallel reality.

Has there ever been any scientific or semi-scientific evidence for parallel realities? I mean beyond the theoretical mathematical evidence or the evidence from quantum physics vaguely suggesting it?

I could never call my experiences scientific or veridical or anything like that ~ they are apparently completely detached into their own isolated realities. Well, isolated in the usual sense, I suppose. If parallel lives are a thing... then the soul might be the only window, the bridge, into these other lives, which is what I thought must be happening, as I couldn't think of any other possibility that would allow such a thing.

The skeptical hypothesis (that I can't fully ascribe to) would be that much or most of the psychedelically-obtained experience material could have roots in some sort of subconscious confabulation fuelled by psychologically deep unconsciously buried needs. The full capabilities of the subconscious or unconscious mind are not well mapped out, and it seems to me might be quite amazing in terms of fabricating and dramatizing various "stories' with deep psychological importance to the individual.

Indeed. However, I am uncertain as to how I could confabulate something that has had such a strong impact on me. Especially the stronger emotional components of the experiences, which have stuck rather clearly with me.

The problem, as usual, with confabulation claims, is that it can be used to dismiss almost anything out of hand, because it relies on the mind being delusional, wishful thinking, and the like. A blanket claim which is vague and cheap and easy for the skeptic to abuse. It simply doesn't get to the heart of anything ~ it makes it hard to actually figure out what is confabulated and what is real.

It's well-known how easily subconscious confabulation fuelled by conscious/unconscious desires and therapist suggestions enter into the supposed "past lives" elicited under hypnotic regression therapy. This can be quite a prolific source of "stories". I still think that there might be a connection between this last-mentioned phenomenon and psychedelic experiences.

Indeed, it's possible, however I don't recall desiring any of the stuff I experienced, nor have I encountered anything that would have led to me... confusing myself into some delusional state. Well, there is the Legends of the Guardians books and movie, but it's been a year or so since I've read anything about, and a few years since I've watched the movie. So, the timing seems off... not to mention that the storyline of the books and movie don't really seem to match up with anything.

I've had psychosis before, and it didn't qualitatively match this sort of thing ~ I was fully immersed in the moments of these lives. There was no apparent bleedover... except when, now I think about... I was at one point sharply directly called out by name by a very perceptive certain queen I was unconsciously interacting with, too which I had only mild shock as I realized dimly that I was still present, drowsily waking up to the confused disorientation of being called out directly, wondering what just happened. Your existence gets noticed and called out, and it feels pretty surreal. Then parallel-me is told about it at some point, and they vaguely tell me to behave, not really appearing to notice my presence ~ I'm not really noticing myself, either, frankly, at that moment. Just a very dim recollection that quickly fades.

There are OOBEs with veridical anecdotes in psychedelic use, similar to the veridical confirmations we get from NDEs.

I've heard of weird cases like someone who was on a bender which included LSD, MDMA, cocaine and other stuff ~ they state that they saw, for a split second, themselves through the eyes of another person. It shook them pretty bad, as they didn't expect anything like that.

Okay, this is maybe not explicitly OOB, but through the eyes of another, so not their eyes. An out-of-my-eyes experience, lol?

As for a reliable way of peering into non-Earthly realms, not sure such a thing exists. There are some commonalities we can try to map, but also stark differences and even contradictions.

I mean, I've heard of shamans regularly travelling to the upper and lower spiritual planes of existence, but nothing resembling another physical existence.

I feel one can even make the case that Ayahuasca/DMT exploration conforms less to the experiencer's pre-existing beliefs. The one case I can think of where someone meets a spiritual being they'd never heard of - the goddess Tara - was a psychedelic trip.

I have wondered if it is possible that the many deities are either entities being called by different names, or are thought-forms brought into being in the collective unconscious through the power of concentrated belief. I mean, I think I briefly met Zeus one time... and frickin Gandalf. Zeus ~ yeah, sure. Gandalf? Maybe hallucination? Maybe thought-form? No idea. He didn't stop me from passing, though, lol.

edit: Admittedly difficult to judge exactly, because by now plenty of people have expectations for what they will see during an Ayahuasca/DMT trip. But I don't know if any of the subjects Strassman gave DMT to in the 90s were expecting the bizarre clowns and other weird stuff.

Indeed... it could be easy to say that that too is confabulation. I've heard some psychonaut atheists say that they're certain it's all in their heads, despite them having blasted off to DMT hyperspace multiple times.

Another rather strange and bizarre thing that I thought of was... what if... one can be drawn to certain stories because they remind of deeply unconscious memories and experiences you normally have no way of knowing about? Even from parallel realities, which are more distant and more disconnected than past lives in this timeline reality.