The sobering parts of reality that come bubbling up some days...
Warning: Disturbing true story
It has been over a year now since the death of a friend of mine, a practicing shaman from Texas.
He was then followed shortly after by his wife, who wanted to use a form of Maranasati to join him, but used medications instead, likely because she wasn't skilled or capable enough to just shut herself down using her own intent or will power.
The shaman had been a fellow officer, and was involved in a shooting resulting in the death of another, which caused him intense emotional disturbances and mental anguish on a daily basis. He underwent intense therapy, quit the police, and became a shaman after intense medications and even more intense drug abuse.
His last attempt at managing what he called his internal demons was ketamine, after multiple other attempts using psilocybin and ayahuasca. The ayahuasca being the catalyst for deciding he is supposed to be a shaman.
So, for those of you who read my posts and wonder why I have issues with drug abuse, wonder no more.
I never really believed he was an actual shaman, but that never prevented us from discussing deep topics and sharing experiences. His deeply disturbed emotional and mental condition was very apparent at times, and it was reflected quite often in his experiences. He did have the what I consider to be the basic prerequisite to becoming a shaman, which is to dive deep into madness, and return to reality with that door left open. His chaos and daily panic attacks spoke to a disturbed human being and less so of a shaman.
His condition prevented him from clarity in so many of these experiences. He never provided himself, or others, any form of veridical evidence of his abilities or experiences, yet would cling to them like it was his life preserver. He created an entire world where he was still helping and serving others. Most of the people had previously failed mental health treatment, and were turning to others like themselves who believed in the same world dominated by evil spiritual forces that could only be combatted by the spiritually powerful.
Speaking to his wife after his passing, her main interest and focus was making contact and joining him, which I found very cult-like and quite disturbing on many levels. They also left a teenage son behind, who appears to be managing the loss of both with courage, and making his own path.
There has been no contact from either of them since then, even when he promised to try. This is not surprising to me, since many of my close and dear friends have promised this, and none of them have managed to do so. Their entire shamanic lives was like a very intense cult experience full of drugs, hallucinations, and battles with evil entities. If it wasn't tragic reality, it would make an interesting movie.
He was convinced that he and I were incarnations of the same person, even when we were incarnating at the same time. He was also convinced of loosh and that Earth is a loosh farm for entities. Another point we didn't share or see eye-to-eye on. Everything to him became a scenario of evil forces trying to manipulate and control us, steal our energy, abuse us, and blind us. I find this to be an interesting position, where his desire to serve and help people that was the reason he was an officer in the first place, was still in full bloom.
The basics to me, were that causing another person's death broke him at a very deep level, and all of us failed at helping him, and failed in trying to help him repair the damage. We appear to do this on a daily basis, with very little consequence to the people who are supposed to be responsible for trying, the family, friends, the therapists, medical professionals, and our broken medical farce with the insurance profit pigs in charge.
We fail to help the misfits of society, those with mental illness, those less fortunate, those we damage, and ignore the obvious consequences it has on another human being, and those they come in contact with.
We should pay particular attention in the fields that look into Psi phenomena, and in the forums where people congregate, and watch for the obvious aberrations that lead to serious trouble. Those who are in serious trouble usually don't think they are in trouble, and many of them don't think they need or should have to take medications or other forms of help. On one hand, we are supposed to respect religious and spiritual beliefs and practices, and allow the freedom to explore life in all facets. On the other hand, much of this is obviously a seriously troubled zone that we should be addressing.
I currently have a family member that stopped taking medications, cold turkey, and is now running amok and claiming demons are attacking, while doing some very obvious deranged and confused activities. We are powerless to do anything about it, because of the way this society insists on personal freedom being more important than the health and safety of the mentally ill. He is currently throwing thousands of dollars to charlatans who are claiming they will cleanse him and remove the demons. This is what happens when we allow woo woo to exist and call it a free society, no controls, no barriers, just outright scams being allowed in the name of religious freedom. He has a form of drug induced psychosis that comes from years of trying to self-medicate using illicit drugs and hallucinogens, but he was already mentally ill, so he just pushed himself off a cliff trying to fix himself. His first stop after stopping the medications that were helping was ayahuasca, again. He completely fell apart after that, again.
It is always a very difficult thing for me to deal with because I have so many experiences of my own that cross the boundaries of perception and reality. At the same time, I am open to multiple causes for these and I only prop up and support my own experiences that have veridical evidence because of the dangers of mental health issues and how convincing they can be.
How do we define the line between sane and realistic, and that slippery slope that causes so much damage to those fragile minds that end up hurting themselves or others?
Combining the number of sociopaths, psychopaths, mental illness, and the number of people popping pills to feel ok, it has reached a level where likely half the population is seriously unwell. This appears to be bleeding into the popularity cults full of lemmings and influencers, and is seriously coloring the landscape of Psi phenomena and practices.
If you or someone you know is in immediate crisis, call or text 988 anytime in the US and Canada to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. For emergencies, call 911 or go to the nearest hospital. For non-emergency support, you can connect with counselors by texting "MHA" to 741741.
Warning: Disturbing true story
It has been over a year now since the death of a friend of mine, a practicing shaman from Texas.
He was then followed shortly after by his wife, who wanted to use a form of Maranasati to join him, but used medications instead, likely because she wasn't skilled or capable enough to just shut herself down using her own intent or will power.
The shaman had been a fellow officer, and was involved in a shooting resulting in the death of another, which caused him intense emotional disturbances and mental anguish on a daily basis. He underwent intense therapy, quit the police, and became a shaman after intense medications and even more intense drug abuse.
His last attempt at managing what he called his internal demons was ketamine, after multiple other attempts using psilocybin and ayahuasca. The ayahuasca being the catalyst for deciding he is supposed to be a shaman.
So, for those of you who read my posts and wonder why I have issues with drug abuse, wonder no more.
I never really believed he was an actual shaman, but that never prevented us from discussing deep topics and sharing experiences. His deeply disturbed emotional and mental condition was very apparent at times, and it was reflected quite often in his experiences. He did have the what I consider to be the basic prerequisite to becoming a shaman, which is to dive deep into madness, and return to reality with that door left open. His chaos and daily panic attacks spoke to a disturbed human being and less so of a shaman.
His condition prevented him from clarity in so many of these experiences. He never provided himself, or others, any form of veridical evidence of his abilities or experiences, yet would cling to them like it was his life preserver. He created an entire world where he was still helping and serving others. Most of the people had previously failed mental health treatment, and were turning to others like themselves who believed in the same world dominated by evil spiritual forces that could only be combatted by the spiritually powerful.
Speaking to his wife after his passing, her main interest and focus was making contact and joining him, which I found very cult-like and quite disturbing on many levels. They also left a teenage son behind, who appears to be managing the loss of both with courage, and making his own path.
There has been no contact from either of them since then, even when he promised to try. This is not surprising to me, since many of my close and dear friends have promised this, and none of them have managed to do so. Their entire shamanic lives was like a very intense cult experience full of drugs, hallucinations, and battles with evil entities. If it wasn't tragic reality, it would make an interesting movie.
He was convinced that he and I were incarnations of the same person, even when we were incarnating at the same time. He was also convinced of loosh and that Earth is a loosh farm for entities. Another point we didn't share or see eye-to-eye on. Everything to him became a scenario of evil forces trying to manipulate and control us, steal our energy, abuse us, and blind us. I find this to be an interesting position, where his desire to serve and help people that was the reason he was an officer in the first place, was still in full bloom.
The basics to me, were that causing another person's death broke him at a very deep level, and all of us failed at helping him, and failed in trying to help him repair the damage. We appear to do this on a daily basis, with very little consequence to the people who are supposed to be responsible for trying, the family, friends, the therapists, medical professionals, and our broken medical farce with the insurance profit pigs in charge.
We fail to help the misfits of society, those with mental illness, those less fortunate, those we damage, and ignore the obvious consequences it has on another human being, and those they come in contact with.
We should pay particular attention in the fields that look into Psi phenomena, and in the forums where people congregate, and watch for the obvious aberrations that lead to serious trouble. Those who are in serious trouble usually don't think they are in trouble, and many of them don't think they need or should have to take medications or other forms of help. On one hand, we are supposed to respect religious and spiritual beliefs and practices, and allow the freedom to explore life in all facets. On the other hand, much of this is obviously a seriously troubled zone that we should be addressing.
I currently have a family member that stopped taking medications, cold turkey, and is now running amok and claiming demons are attacking, while doing some very obvious deranged and confused activities. We are powerless to do anything about it, because of the way this society insists on personal freedom being more important than the health and safety of the mentally ill. He is currently throwing thousands of dollars to charlatans who are claiming they will cleanse him and remove the demons. This is what happens when we allow woo woo to exist and call it a free society, no controls, no barriers, just outright scams being allowed in the name of religious freedom. He has a form of drug induced psychosis that comes from years of trying to self-medicate using illicit drugs and hallucinogens, but he was already mentally ill, so he just pushed himself off a cliff trying to fix himself. His first stop after stopping the medications that were helping was ayahuasca, again. He completely fell apart after that, again.
It is always a very difficult thing for me to deal with because I have so many experiences of my own that cross the boundaries of perception and reality. At the same time, I am open to multiple causes for these and I only prop up and support my own experiences that have veridical evidence because of the dangers of mental health issues and how convincing they can be.
How do we define the line between sane and realistic, and that slippery slope that causes so much damage to those fragile minds that end up hurting themselves or others?
Combining the number of sociopaths, psychopaths, mental illness, and the number of people popping pills to feel ok, it has reached a level where likely half the population is seriously unwell. This appears to be bleeding into the popularity cults full of lemmings and influencers, and is seriously coloring the landscape of Psi phenomena and practices.
If you or someone you know is in immediate crisis, call or text 988 anytime in the US and Canada to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. For emergencies, call 911 or go to the nearest hospital. For non-emergency support, you can connect with counselors by texting "MHA" to 741741.
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